Personal Hygiene
Hi! I'm Petra Boynton.

I'm a sex researcher with over 10 years experience. My PhD is on porn (truly!), assessing the effects of sex in the media. I train health professionals to talk about sex, and advise a number of organisations like the Family Planning Association, and BBC World Service on sex coverage. I've a regular telephone sex phone in on the BBC, and write several columns on sex and relationships.
Your Question
Hi Dr. Petra, Is it ok for a 19 year old girl to have all out sex with a 56 year old man? Are there side effects that wouldn't occur if it were done with a younger partner? Yep, I'm the 19 year old girl. Please advise me if this is ok or not. Marie
Dr Petra's Response
Age gap relationships can work when there’s a few years between a couple, but when the gap is as large as yours I’d be concerned. Why doesn’t he have relationships with women nearer his own age? What does he want from you? What can he offer you that guys your age can’t?

You’re probably flattered a mature man likes you, and no doubt he’s thrilled a young lady’s keen on him. How are you going to have this relationship? Will you be able to socialize with his friends and he with yours? What interests will you share in common? How will you manage in a decade or two when you’re still young and he’ll be a pensioner? If you were to have children how would you cope possibly having to care for them and him if he got sick?

Only you can decide what to do, but if I were you I would tell the guy I like him and am flattered, but that you want relationships with someone nearer your age – and suggest he does the same. It doesn’t mean you don’t have to be friends, but I think a relationship with him could be complicated and may bring with it more problems than it’s worth.

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Personal Hygiene
Ive just starting to become sexually active with my boyfriend

[2 comments]
millly
posted - 10/03/2008 13:52:00
if you love him then thats fine, just as long as you feel he isn't to old for you (and there aren't any better guys looking your way)
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